Life is an endless poem unrhymed. Relish its sweetness and crisp, recite or write it as you may.

The Freak Out


My  man just told me he’s to watch a movie after his work tonight.
He’s watching a movie when he don’t usually have enough energy to talk to me over the phone.
He’s watching a movie when he has been complaining how exhausted he is after work. 
He’s watching a movie when he had started our day (still) complaining how busy he is.
He’s watching a movie when it has been a year when he had asked me to watch one.
He’s watching a movie when the last time he asked me to it, he was not actually able to made it.
Worse, he’s watching a movie ALONE without even asking if I want to come along.
Even worst, he’s watching a movie, given all the instances I have just mentioned and he had the darn guts to tell me so!


Let my rage be not mistaken that it’s because of him not taking me out to movie. It’s not as petty as it seems (at least on my part). It’s the thought of him telling me about it when he should rather have not if he’s considerate enough. 

I made him know I’m pissed, he laughed it off. He deterred by asking me out ---- and hey, the good news is, for a movie date!

Just so he thought it’s the best escape route. Just so he thought this obliged, forced and attempt-to-bribe you invitation would console me. Hell No! It just infused my rage even more.

So he thinks that’s all? That, that’s what pissed me off? That, that’s what made me feel he’s really inconsiderate? It’s far more than that. It has rooted from this year long attempt at a not-in-a-relationship but romantically-affiliated status that we have.   

It’s not about the movie. It’s not about me.

It’s about him not even considering to find and spend quality time with me, but only for himself alone. And it’s about the series of these instances that came in irony with this movie thing he brought up that really freaks the hell out of me.   


* As I finished this entry, he was calling (to apologize perhaps? Or maybe to just ask what am I pissed about). 
  
February 23, 2012, 07:26 PM
A Five-minute infuse





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